Feeling Let Down

Psalm 126:5 Those who sow with tears will reap with songs of joy

Has anything ever happened in your life where you were so mad you just wanted to yell. You feel like He let you down. You wonder how could He let this happen to you. How could He possibly allow this. Like God actually might have let you down. But you’re afraid of saying something or complaining, or you do say something and complain but feel guilty. Have you ever thought of stepping away and having that honest conversation about how you feel with God.

Think about it with me for a second. You were counting on that job. It was going to help you finally pay those bills. It was the thing you were counting on to feed you and your kids. But it fell through completely and now you are wondering why? Why God? Did I do something wrong? Was I mean to my neighbor and now I am being punished? Was there something I was supposed to do but didn’t? It can be very hard when you are in this position.

Your heart hurts. You want to scream. Why not take it to God. 

Let Him know how you really feel. Let Him know how much it hurts. Let the tears come out with Him. Let the fears and the worries come out. He already sees your heart. So you’re not hiding anything. There’s nothing a dad would like more than having his child come and cry to him and not to someone else about what He allowed and didn’t allow. At least our Heavenly Father would. It gives us a chance to let out our feelings and truth. Then it gives God a chance to swoop in and comfort us in the best way that we could ever be comforted. The Joy of the Lord is better than any fleeting joy we could ever get through chocolate or a good tv show. It lasts longer and is much deeper. Plus it comes with a side of peace. Peace that surpasses any understanding. Basically you will be so peaceful you will be so amazed you could feel this way as the fires burn around you. 

I have done this many times. I tell him when it hurts and when it sucks. One day I got mad at God. Of course, I felt guilty after. Then I listened to a podcast by Rick Warren who mentioned how any attention we give God is in a sense worship. Whether we are joyful or sad or even angry. We are taking that moment to focus on God. What makes it better is pausing after to listen to what He has to say to you. Whether its words or feelings. I felt my first hug in that moment the EMT said “he’s dead” over my husband’s body forgetting his wife was standing right behind him. Everything around me started to turn fuzzy but in that instant I felt a hug from the back. Huge arms wrapped around me with love. It felt so real. But when I look back I was standing against a wall. So it was impossible to be anyone else. That is one of the many things God is to us. Our comforter. 

You want to cry and beg and scream. But through it all He will reach over and give you His comfort and in that moment it’s the best thing you could ever ask for. It gives you the strength to move on to the true blessing that God is really holding on for you. In other words, that bigger teddy bear.