What Are You Trying to Prove?

“Be a good person, don’t waste time trying to prove it.” - Unknown

In this honest open space I’m just going to say it. I’m trying to prove that I’m not lazy. When I was a kid someone once told me I’m lazy. I don’t remember who or what happened. All I remember was the statement being said. Now all I know is that since then I have spent my life trying to prove that I’m not. It’s crazy how a comment an adult says to you can suddenly define your life. I’m not even sure if it was said to me more than once. It could have been. But that one moment is the one that replays in my mind over and over and I find myself trying to prove it wrong. 

Because of this unhealthy moment, I push myself past my limit trying to prove them wrong. I don’t even remember who they are. Yet here I am up early and going until the sun sets late. I don’t even remember the circumstances yet if I sense anyone around me has any thought of thinking I am lazy I must prove I am not. No one later on in my life has ever called me lazy. They have told me I need to slow down. They have mentioned there’s a lot on my plate. They have said take a break. But yet in my head I swear they think I am lazy. So this is where I was. Having an argument with myself because I felt my friend was looking at me with judging eyes. Her mouth was telling me I need to take it easy. I need a break. But in my head I was thinking she thinks you are lazy. 

I immediately paused. Something did not seem right. This was my own thought telling me this but I was in a place in my life where I was now aware enough to fight this thought and realize it was trying to make me crazy! What am I trying to prove? To whom am I trying to prove this to? I had given myself a task that no one asked me to take. One moment that I could remember in my childhood had left me scarred as a child with the task of forever proving I was not lazy. It was not even a close friend or family member. That much I remember. So why was this even important to me? My pause led to some reflection and realization.

I don’t have to prove anything to anyone. I know who I am and who God made me. 

All of this comes back to the fact that “You are enough”. I am enough. I sat in my car for a while telling myself this. I accepted that someone had an opinion of me but that didn’t mean everyone thought the same. Even if anyone else did, that was not my problem. My one and only problem is how God feels about me. Did I do the purpose He placed on my life. I have nothing to prove to anyone and neither do you. Is there something you were once told or made to feel and have spent your life trying to prove them wrong. It doesn’t have to be from when you were a child. It could have been in college, in a relationship, at your job, last week even. Do you find yourself focused and pushing to prove a point of who you are? There is no need for that. We need to accept that we are fine. No one is perfect so they are not allowed to make you feel less than. 

Breathe in freedom and breathe out the pressure to prove. If the person is still around trying to make you feel less than I want to tell you that you are not. You are more, you are loved, you are needed. God will send you a reminder so keep an eye out for it. If you don’t believe me you will see that it’s true. You have nothing to prove to anybody but yourself.