I Am Sorry

Life can be unfair. Don’t let anyone tell you that you deserved it. - Unknown

I am sorry. I am sorry that you have to deal with a pain no one should ever have to deal with. I am sorry that you have had to handle so much in your life. I am sorry you had to endure a hurt or betrayal that struck to your core and left you scarred. I am sorry that you were forced to make choices that still make you question yourself and life. I am sorry you had to go through experiences that still haunt your memories. I am sorry if you are dealing with issues that just don’t seem to want to go away. I am sorry that for every healing step you take forward you feel yourself take painful steps backwards. I am sorry for the moments when you felt safe, the rug was pulled out from under you and you are still trying to get your balance back. I am sorry that your trust was shattered to a million pieces and you’re not sure if you will ever have it back again. I am sorry that you are fighting fear, sadness, worry and insecurities each day with all of your might. I am sorry that you were violated and robbed and nowhere feels safe for you. I am sorry that suddenly nothing in this world seems to make sense anymore or you can’t comprehend what is even happening now. 

Through all of this I am sorry that there were times you had no say in the matter. I am sorry you were not given the support you needed. I am sorry you were given the wrong advice or forced to do the wrong thing. I am sorry that you were working out of your best interest and it blew up in your face. I am sorry that you tried your best and it didn’t work. I am sorry that you feel like you’ve given it your all only to be judged like you haven’t. I am sorry that you keep hoping for the best and have yet to see it. I am sorry that everyday you pray for a miracle and wonder when it will come. I am sorry that you feel like a failure or lacking. I am sorry that you even had to fight. That you even had to run. That you even had to just stand there and take it. That you even had to deal with any of it. I am sorry. 

I’m not here to give advice or to tell you what needs to be done or to wish you any luck with anything. I am here as a friend saying sorry. There are times when all we want is that hug, that support, that love, that silent moment, that tub of ice cream and a movie, that glass of wine and a shoulder and that is it. I wish I was there in person to give that to you. But instead I send you my love through this message and pray that God gives you the peace that you need. Please be kind to yourself. You are worth it.